


We Might As Well Be Strangers

by EmilyRLightwood



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Broken Heart, Episode Related, M/M, Malec, Malec!Angst, Post-Break Up, Sad, Sad Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 07:56:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11869953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmilyRLightwood/pseuds/EmilyRLightwood
Summary: "This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t be losing the man who had become so important to him in such a short amount of time; the man who had opened Alec’s heart and shown him that there was more to life than duty."





	We Might As Well Be Strangers

**Author's Note:**

> Sometimes when you're going through hard times, the best way to work through your feelings is to express them in some way, whether that be writing a song, writing in a journal, or using beloved characters and working through their pain to help you with yours. Magnus and Alec must endure angsty moments in their relationship just like every other couple out there.
> 
> This fic is centered around events in 2.18 and 2.19. It was inspired by the song "We Might as Well be Strangers" by Keane. If you're feeling really angsty, you might listen to it while you read this.
> 
> https://youtu.be/gPuH43GOtjI
> 
> Thank you to Ana @ajenno for helping me with the timeline and dialogue and other logistics of this piece of writing.  
> Thank you to Malec for inspiring me and giving me a way to work through my pain.  
> And thank YOU to my readers for giving me a reason to keep writing.
> 
> @EmilyRLightwood on twitter. Any mistakes are mine. Enjoy...

“Magnus, we can figure this out…”

 

“You once asked me what I was afraid of.  It’s this.”

 

Alec could hardly make eye contact with Magnus as the elevator doors closed. Tears stung behind his eyes as he stood in the hallway alone.

 

This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t be losing the man who had become so important to him in such a short amount of time; the man who had opened Alec’s heart and shown him that there was more to life than duty.

 

But he had lost him. Magnus was gone.  Magnus didn’t think he could protect the Downworld and be with Alec, and he had chosen the Downworld.

 

After checking one last time that Max was okay, Alec quietly snuck away to his room and locked the door behind him.  He didn’t think he could keep his feelings in check any longer, and he didn’t want his family to see him like this.

 

Alec Lightwood collapsed on his bed and buried his head in his pillow to muffle his sobs.

 

~~~

 

Four days.  Four days without a single text or call from Magnus. Four mornings of Alec waking up alone in his cold, stiff bed at the institute.  Four nights of being up all night stewing over everything he could have possibly done wrong while he and Magnus were together.

 

Alec held onto some hope that he would have a chance to fix things.  The Downworld Council was meeting at the institute to discuss Valentine and Sebastian (or more accurately, Jonathan) and how they should proceed.

 

“Magnus, what is she talking about?”

 

Magnus wouldn’t even look at him.  He wore a look of disdain on his face as he let the seelie queen speak for the entire Downworld.

 

He couldn’t be serious. Did Magnus honestly think that any decisions the queen made would be to benefit any downworlders other than the seelies in her court and herself?

 

Magnus glared at Alec and his siblings as he followed the queen out of the meeting room like a puppy.  Who was this man?  This was not the same man who had romanced Alec in Tokyo. This was not the same man who had opened up to Alec about his traumatic past.  The man who left that meeting room was a man Alec didn’t know.

 

~~~

 

Alec tried to remain calm as he knocked on the door to Magnus’s loft.  He almost lost his cool when Magnus tried shutting the door in Alec’s face.

 

“Izzy has located the rift the demons are coming from.”

 

“Oh and you want me to seal it. What a surprise.”

 

“We need a warlock to seal one this severe.”

 

“Duh.”

 

Why was he being so snarky?  It was one thing that Magnus no longer wanted to be with him, but Alec didn’t understand why Magnus was being so cold.  He wanted nothing more than to reach out and wrap Magnus in his arms, to feel that familiar touch of Magnus wrapped around his body, to bury his face in his neck and breathe in his warlock. 

 

But he couldn’t. Magnus was no longer Alec’s and Alec was no longer Magnus’s.

 

As Magnus shut the door to his loft, Alec felt his chest constrict and the heart that he didn’t think could break anymore felt even heavier.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [We Might As Well Be Strangers (Podfic)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15580683) by [AiJamaisFacil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AiJamaisFacil/pseuds/AiJamaisFacil)




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